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Discussion around a glass of water...

(This is definitely more general philosophy than Service Management, but I think it fits better here than in my General Ramblings blog section.)

Pessimist: This glass is half empty.

Optimist: It's half full!

Engineer: The glass is operating at 50% capacity. My research shows the optimal operating capacity is 92.3%. We should transfer the water to an appropriately-sized glass, and keep the larger glass readily available for unexpected peaks in demand.

Middle Manager: With this increased efficiency, we can fire the engineer!

Paranoid: Did someone poison this water?

Conspiracy Theorist: The government did.

Schizophrenic: With alien DNA!

Pragmatist: You're all missing the point! What's the best use of this water?

Communist: Let the people decide!

Democrat: Well... 51% of the people, anyway.

Republican: The people don't know what's best for them. That's why they elected us to decide FOR them!

Socialist: The state should find the best method of distributing the water among the people in the most equitable fashion.

Liberal: Good idea! Give each person one drop of water, starting with those in the most need. When we run out, we'll figure something else out.

Cynic: You're only saying that because it makes you feel better about yourself.

Aristocrat: Wait! What?? Start with those who need it LEAST.

Conservative: You can redistribute this water when you pry it from my cold, dead hands! I earned this glass of water and will defend it, and the other 50,000 gallons in my basement, with deadly force, if I have to!

Libertarian: Screw all of you. I'm going to get my own water.

Anarchist: We should all be responsible for getting our own water. People's inherent compassion, integrity and good sense will result in the most equitable cooperative conglomerates.

Marketing Executive: This stylish, functional glass will continue to quench your thirst for the rest of your life. (*Endless supply of water not included.)

Sales Executive: Don't worry. I'll make sure you always get the lowest water rates.

Corporate Executive: Lifetime glasses leaves us with diminishing demand. We need to make these glasses more fragile.

Fashionista: That glass is so last week, ANYWAY...

Hippie: Water should be free for all!

Capitalist: OK. But you have to pay license fees to use the glass.

CEO: Brilliant! Fire the imbecile who came up with the fragile glasses and hire that guy!

The Thirsty People: Put the imbecile in Congress!

October 07, 2015, 10:13:47 am

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